Yet another emotional breakdown.. The problem is me ofcourse .... the cause .... again me ..... a sentimental fool I am.... I am repeating my mistakes again and again, I am not learning from past mistakes and that's has been happening so many times with me. If someone doesn't learn anything from his past mistakes and just keeps on repeating them, he/she is bound to stumble at some time soon. There just can't be any excuse whatsoever .... one may repeat a mistake once or twice or thrice...but repeating the same one again and again is like making a fool of himself/herself. I have made a fool of me so many times all these years, and yet again each time, getting up and continuing with the same line, not learning anything at all, as if nothing had happened. That's a fool of me.... It's not that I don't realise where I am going wrong each time ... I realise the real cause almost each time, but yet forgetting so easily what all had happened just a moment ago.
I have always been a very bad judge of people ... who is of what type, I have so many times faltered! and I am yet to know people or correctly judge people. And the main reason is perhaps I easily start trusting them with just a few sweet words said by them. The second most important reason --- my habit of getting emotionally attached with people, so much so that when hit, it really hurts. No two people are of the same kind ... that's true. But one should always keep a limit of everything...there has to be a limit. Excess of anything is bound to be of bitter taste. Each time I preach myself of these things and each time with a few sweet words, so easily forget everything and get on with it. And that perhaps has been the reason that have been hurt again.
Whatever be it ..... once you know that certain people are just superficially attached, one should then check oneself and keep within himself, held himself back. I had always believed that in every relationship, there should be no half measures .... just keep on pouring everything that you have, all that u have, into it -- ur love, ur affection, ur time, ur understanding, all that u possibly can give. But perhaps that's not the ideal way to go, atleast not always! Atleast that's what I have learnt so far. This should be the case if the other person is really deserving that. But what if the other person has all along just been playing around with u, ur emotions. All this long, these were just a time-pass and u were just a mode for that time-pass!
Now if I am bad at judging people, which I am, I should get back into my cocoon and lock myself up in my own world. Staying away from people, these superficial relations and perhaps everyone ...... away from orkut, gtalk, gmail ..... these three have been the main culprits for me, for all my setbacks with relations.... I should back off and stay away as long as possible....That's not the ideal solution, nor is a permanent one. But then, atleast that will give some respite for the time-being, away from everyone. How many times, such a phase has come in my life ...lost count ... but one thing is certain.... with time, everything becomes normal. Instead of just blindly following one's heart, sometimes one should go with the brain as well.
Keeping myself held back.... with my checked emotions .... closing my eyes to everything happening around and just being me with myself ... that should be the ideal solution for the time-being. I am sure, with time passing by, my emotional dependency will also go away. I just need to back away from everything, keep myself engaged in other works, my own works and not bother or interfere with others. Instead of dragging my feet into their problems, I should let them fight their own battles and me fighting my own. Nothing comes off from this emotional attachments, the less I meddle with others problems, the more happier I will be. I have perhaps got no right to keep myself off from my share of happiness and this emotional dependency has been the biggest cause of all problems and hurts for me. Let me try out, I am sure, with time I will get over it. I will have to ..... It's of no use making a fool of oneself again and again. And if I again don't learn this time as well, even God can't help me out the next time around!
I have always been a very bad judge of people ... who is of what type, I have so many times faltered! and I am yet to know people or correctly judge people. And the main reason is perhaps I easily start trusting them with just a few sweet words said by them. The second most important reason --- my habit of getting emotionally attached with people, so much so that when hit, it really hurts. No two people are of the same kind ... that's true. But one should always keep a limit of everything...there has to be a limit. Excess of anything is bound to be of bitter taste. Each time I preach myself of these things and each time with a few sweet words, so easily forget everything and get on with it. And that perhaps has been the reason that have been hurt again.
Whatever be it ..... once you know that certain people are just superficially attached, one should then check oneself and keep within himself, held himself back. I had always believed that in every relationship, there should be no half measures .... just keep on pouring everything that you have, all that u have, into it -- ur love, ur affection, ur time, ur understanding, all that u possibly can give. But perhaps that's not the ideal way to go, atleast not always! Atleast that's what I have learnt so far. This should be the case if the other person is really deserving that. But what if the other person has all along just been playing around with u, ur emotions. All this long, these were just a time-pass and u were just a mode for that time-pass!
Now if I am bad at judging people, which I am, I should get back into my cocoon and lock myself up in my own world. Staying away from people, these superficial relations and perhaps everyone ...... away from orkut, gtalk, gmail ..... these three have been the main culprits for me, for all my setbacks with relations.... I should back off and stay away as long as possible....That's not the ideal solution, nor is a permanent one. But then, atleast that will give some respite for the time-being, away from everyone. How many times, such a phase has come in my life ...lost count ... but one thing is certain.... with time, everything becomes normal. Instead of just blindly following one's heart, sometimes one should go with the brain as well.
Keeping myself held back.... with my checked emotions .... closing my eyes to everything happening around and just being me with myself ... that should be the ideal solution for the time-being. I am sure, with time passing by, my emotional dependency will also go away. I just need to back away from everything, keep myself engaged in other works, my own works and not bother or interfere with others. Instead of dragging my feet into their problems, I should let them fight their own battles and me fighting my own. Nothing comes off from this emotional attachments, the less I meddle with others problems, the more happier I will be. I have perhaps got no right to keep myself off from my share of happiness and this emotional dependency has been the biggest cause of all problems and hurts for me. Let me try out, I am sure, with time I will get over it. I will have to ..... It's of no use making a fool of oneself again and again. And if I again don't learn this time as well, even God can't help me out the next time around!
